Letting Go of the old me

There are weight loss stories all over the place. A couple loses 300lbs, a house wife loses 200lbs, your neighbor loses 50lbs, etc. Each person has their own story and reasons for their transformation.

When I started this journey I didn’t do it because I thought I was overweight, that didn’t come until much later in my journey. I started out because I was in pain and bored. I knew I needed to lose some weight, just didn’t know how much.

I thought for years, I’m going to lose the person I am. I’m not going to know who I am anymore. And yes I don’t know who I am anymore, but I’m happy!

I’m learning what I can do, not putting limitations on myself and that is more amazing that worrying about losing myself. I have learned so much about who I am and what I’m capable of on this journey that I can’t even express half of it.

I have learned the reasons why I make certain decisions, how to start over, where to forgive and forget. Everything I held in for years and refused to learn I learned. I’m not near my goal. I’m looking into getting my excess skin removed, and focusing in on myself more than I have ever done before.

I don’t know what I will look like at the end, if I will ever get that tattoo I promised myself at the end, or where I will be, but I’m excited to know. Don’t get me wrong, I wish I was a size 6, skinny “nothing” type of girl; my journey wouldn’t have been hard. But I loved that I have had to fight for what I have, I appreciate every step of the journey, even the evil ones, because they have taught me so much.

I laugh every time I reach a new goal, because I think why did I ever think I couldn’t do that? Patience is the key on life and while I have patience with so many things, with myself I never have. I’m healthy, don’t have to be on medications and I can’t tell you how happy that makes me.

So take it slow, allow yourself to forgive, forget and laugh as much as possible because at the end of the day, you have to be happy with where you came from, even if it’s just a few extra steps. Don’t worry if you mess up, start over, push harder and set goals. Nothing is truly impossible unless you tell yourself you can’t, you are your only barrier. Everything else takes time, patience and practice.

Next stage ~ So excited

I'm excited to announce that I have decided to contact a plastic surgeon about my options for skin removal.

I'm not sure if my insurance will pay for it, they usually don't. But I'm going to try.

When you loose large amounts of weight you will always have skin, just depends on whether it will be able to go back to some form of its old self or not. Mine however will not, I've been overweight for most of my life, I have stretch marks onto of my stretch marks.

My friends and family support this decision, even though its more money. I thought at first I would be ok with just losing weight, but when I look in the mirror I just want to rip the skin off. I'm not looking to be a super model I just want to feel comfortable in my own skin.

My first consultation is in two weeks. I'm hoping to write about it and then weigh (no pun intended) my options for a better, brighter future.